It’s a Jungle Out There

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Hi, my name is Molly, and I date.

But I don’t just date, I happen to (maybe) hold the record for the world’s most horrifying dates. Seriously, my dating life is a ravaged battlefield, a datealanche, if you will. A datepocalypse.

Now, I don’t want to blame all my dating issues solely on the absurd freak show parade of carnivalesque men that I, for some reason, continue to choose. But let’s face it, they contribute.

For a while now my friends have told me that I should really write this madness down. Possibly because they’re tired of hearing stories like, “so I went out with this guy, and guess what he has pierced and tattooed a plural amount of times?”.

I’ll be changing the names of both the assholes and the innocent, less to protect them and more to protect myself from being sued by them.

So, in the interest of storytelling, catharsis, comedy, and excavation, welcome to my blog.

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